Searching for answers…
Life can be difficult, and you may be worried about your business or having to telecommute to the office.
You may be stressed for others in your family, as you juggle their education and dreams.
One of my clients, a high-ranking officer in the military, is concerned about how he is going to make his pathway to the promotion he seeks.
One man wants to use his advanced degree to relocate but can’t seem to figure out where and how.
A businesswoman who runs a small business is fighting the stress of feeling all alone with her problems.
A middle-aged woman feels lonely having lost her husband recently to cancer. She says she can’t find friends in “world full of ‘couples.”
Identifying your needs and finding a plan…
Once we’ve identified the stress, we begin the process of looking for ways to respond to the stress to relieve you of the fears and maybe underlying anger. It is seeing the world through your eyes.
I want to empathize with you to better understand you. Our worlds may be different; but when it comes right down to it, we often share the same concerns.
We will find a plan that is better than the one that isn’t doing the job. Just about every worry has a solution, and it must be one that fits your life.
Brandi* was caught in a cycle and needed a deep breath!
Brandi is a highly paid insurance sales executive who specializes in commercial real estate. She is divorced with two young children.
By the time she gets home from work and pays the sitter, she’s exhausted. She spends her evenings helping the children with their homework, making dinner, and running their baths… and then she puts them to bed. Then she’s up until after midnight working on the computer. She then gets up at 6 am and does it all over again.
It’s a never-ending cycle, and she is looking for a way out… but, of course, she doesn’t want to give up the money.
Coupled with her job stress is boyfriend stress. She says that men come in and out of her life, but she’s not sure that any of them are right for her and her children.
I use the Bible as a basis for my counseling.
I also believe Jesus is a walking psychologist, pastor, and teacher. Not to mention… He’s God!
Jesus knew how to think straight and wasn’t afraid to ask questions or to give commands (He’s God, right?).
In her job, Brandi knew she had a good product for a big client, but the client was stalling. She was getting pressure from her boss to close the deal.
One of Brandi’s barriers was the fear to be assertive. She once told me, “When it comes to asking the client to sign the contract, I freeze. I’m not sure I feel good enough.”
We went to the Bible to look at how Jesus responded to criticism from the chief elders. He spoke the truth boldly and did not give an inch on his beliefs.
Jesus felt empowered and confident. He didn’t shift blame, he didn’t run away, he didn’t get angry. No… he spoke the truth in love.
Before the next appointment, Brandi texted me that she had, indeed, closed the deal.
Coming into the realization that “nothing succeeds like success,” her stress began to go away…
… in her job, anyway. The men in her life still caused her stress…
The Bible’s wisdom for all our ills…
But one day she met a man named Jason*. At first, he seemed like the ideal man: a good job, single, and attentive. But as she got to know him better, she discovered plenty of traps. She wondered why she attracted these kinds of men.
Once again, we turned to the Bible for the answer. In her desire to find a good man, she became desperate. The problem was her man-picking template.
Coming from a troubled family, Brandi didn’t have a good idea what a decent man was like. Unfortunately, her father came from a troubled home, and he did not know how to rear his daughter. Mom was so passive that Dad had to do most of the parenting.
When Brandi was a teen, boys were attracted to her – but she couldn’t discern who was good and who wasn’t.
She sought help from me because she needed to be okay being alone instead of running after men. Well, she kept doing that, but we worked together to develop a new and healthier man-picker.
To fix the man-picker template, we must look at some wise Bible verses that defines what a husband is supposed to be like. For instance, he is to be one who loves you like Christ loves the church. This means he will love you more than you love him.
Well, that’s a new wrinkle, isn’t it?
But what kind of behavior is this man supposed to exhibit?
His traits are patience, not easily angered, interested in you, affectionate, among others. We need to adjust your man-picker to find this guy. And, where do you find him? That’s what we must think about when we put our heads together.
Talking to a counselor is exciting!
You are going to realize parts about yourself you never knew you had. There are needs inside you that you may or may not know about. These needs come to the surface in counseling, and we can apply them to our new plan.
It is an adventure, because you never know where God is going to take you in your life.
In Ephesians, Paul talks about the power within us that can do far more than we would ever dare to ask or dream!
What does that mean for you? A new career, mate, your children? We never know where the Holy Spirit is going to direct our thoughts and heart.
You just don’t know how He might want to change the way you see others and yourself.
Counseling is about truth. Sometimes we must admit things about ourselves that needs to be changed or just tweaked. How do other people see you and how difficult or easy is it to change? For instance, The Bible says, “Speak the truth in love…”
What if we did that for everyone? What new worlds would open up for you?
It’s time to renew your mind… with Jesus at the center.
The Bible is the best source for well-being, because it’s God’s plan for encouragement and a renewed mind… a mind that thinks like Jesus. Once we get to thinking like our Savior, life gets easier and much better.
Yes, we will continue to have problems come our way. We will have things happen to us that are unfair and uncalled for. But now we will turn to God and remember what we learned in counseling to face the future with boldness.
At this point, you may be asking yourself whether we’ll be a good fit. Will I be able to help you through your stress and worries? Those are excellent questions, and I will answer them the best I know how.
You can call, or you can stall – it’s up to you. Again, I will do my best to help you, but I must know who you are.
I’ll give you a free 15-minute-or-so consultation, and we can get the counseling process started right on the phone. Call or text me today: (916) 769-4673.
*Names changed to preserve client confidentiality.