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MARRIAGE ULTIMATUMS

  Ultimatums are the result when boundaries don’t work.   A boundary is setting a parameter for what is okay behavior and not okay behavior.  However, when one partner begins to violate the boundaries to the extent that there is chronic disrespect an ultimatum...

FRIENDSHIP BEFORE ROMANCE?

It would be nice if a person first became a friend and then a romantic attraction.  It just seems more civil.  Sometimes this happens, but most studies agree that people fall in love with the physical attractiveness of the other person.   Behavior they don’t...

THANKSGIVING, ALCOHOL AND ANGER

Thanksgiving, Alcohol and Anger Millions of Americans will gather tomorrow for Thanksgiving.  A time do thank Our Savior for what He did on the Cross to save us from eternal punishment. It’s also a time to gather in a home to eat heartily and, perhaps, to over indulge...

MARRIAGE CONTEMPT

The term ‘familiarity breeds contempt’ goes back a long way but its’ basic tenet is this:  When two people know a lot about each other there are traits that are bound to come up that the other doesn’t like.  Thus, criticism. What are they seeing? So try to see...

MARRIAGE GASLIGHTING

Marriage Gaslighting is manipulation by one spouse to convince the other spouse they are unable to see their own reality.  One kind of gaslighting is the need to always be right, regardless of evidence to the contrary and whether or not they have shifted positions in...

WHAT HAPPENS TO ME WHEN I DIE?

WHAT HAPPENS TO ME WHEN I DIE? For those who believe in Jesus (Christians) you will go to be with Jesus when you die.  Where that is or what that looks like is a mystery but we have no fear because Jesus is there.  (John 14:1-9) Will I be punished for my sins? No. ...

HALLOWEEN AND HALLOW’S EVE

Halloween and Hallow’s Eve Millions ‘do’ Halloween.  Sure, it’s fun for kids and the sugar companies.  But more importantly Hallow’s Eve is the night before All Saints Day where we honor those who have gone to heaven. Halloween has nothing to do with All Saints...

SUDDENLY WE’RE LIVING TOGETHER!

SUDDENLY WE’RE LIVING TOGETHER! There are many reasons you may decide to quickly move in together.  The main reason is loneliness.  The other reason is that you’re not sure it will work.  But then suddenly we’re living together! Internet playground Today’s...

KEEPING THE PEACE WITH A NARCISSIST

KEEPING THE PEACE WITH A NARCISSIST Living with a person who is argumentative, not caring and only thinking of themselves is extraordinarily taxing.   Who are these people? A narcissist is an adult who often was abused as a child and not nurtured by a parent.  It is a...

WHAT HAVE I BECOME?

What do I want to be? What am I doing with my life? What have I become? These are stages of life that at some point you should examine.  This sounds like your career doesn’t it?  It could be both career and personal life.   What do I want to become? Instead of...